Its tough. It does help to learn dialectical materialism. This made me understand that my frankly horrific childhood was not because my parents hated me or because i was wrong but because the system hates us all (so to speak) and it runs on pain.

You can always try and emmigrate to a socialist country and leave it all behind and help there and hopefully get proper help too. Provided you have some resources or can gather them through friends. It is not impossible in general.

Because being miserable and fawning in imperialist or colonial countries does not help anyone. It doesnt help you nor the cause.

I fought for 30 years to get out of my childhood trauma and am somewhat able to contribute bit i too am always playing with the idea to go support a socialist country somewhere because it is not unlikely that my net contribution over there would be higher.

Good luck and sympathies to you comrade.

– and it gets more abusive when you point out how abusive they are.

good news is you can!

you can’t save everyone as an individual, might as well do what you can and not fuss.