When i first heard the news, it felt surreal. But when that passed, i felt nothing.
I don’t really know what to do or feel. I saw her only a few days ago, and that was the first time i have saw her in years. She barely talked, she had alzheimers. She didn’t remember anyone. I remember as a child, seeing her handicapped but still able to have conversation and conscious.
I only have a few memories of her. It’s so vague, since those were when i was 6 or something. The only clear memory is of her yelling at me as a child. Or maybe not her, my memory is unreliable.
Half an hour later, it sunk in. She’s dead. I will never see her again. Just… I don’t know. I’m so confused. I’m a little teary eyed but the rest is just static. What of it? What do i expect to gain from this post? I don’t know. I just wanted to tell someone. I just feel like shit.
Alzheimer’s can result in pre-mourning, since most of the person’s personality can be gone long before they die. It can result in a particularly strange mourning process. It sucks.
Sorry for your loss.
I remember they had to tell her who each of us are, it was sad. And thank you.
yup, this is common with terminal illnesses in general, particularly ones that result in a lot of physical or emotional suffering. A lot of people feel guilty that a person’s death could cause them to feel so much relief, even if it’s specifically in relation to the end of their loved one’s suffering. There’s no right way to mourn.