Hello guys, I hope that you’re all doing well, I found out about this place through my friend, you might know him as Kirby so let’s just call him that. We all know that the internet is a wasteland as far as leftist spaces go and that’s the reason he was on this website for years in the first place.
As far as I know he was banned many months ago for some reason(he didn’t tell me, he just told he was banned and gave up on it), but since then he doesn’t have a leftist space to go since reddit pretty much purged those some time ago and the same thing on other social media, left is dead in real life here and not to mention constant western oriented content, comments and news, it got particularly intense lately.
During the recent events in the past few months, Kirby is on downward spiral and his sanity is worrying me. Almost every time we met he had unhinged rants about western white people, how he wants Yellowstone to explode and destroy United States after every non-western is evacuated, how he wants to watch cartels execute white Americans, especially republicans, how he personally wants to kill every western and western-aligned leader starting with American presidents and Erdogan and is cheering on NATO infighting over Greenland. Being a leftist, I also heavily dislike the west, but I wouldn’t want a nuclear war or volcanic cataclysm to take place because of it, he was always hating on west, but never said stuff this unhinged, stuff that I wrote isn’t even scratching the surface of everything he said. When he’s on PC and not on the internet, he’s playing GTA V and constantly killing cops and in the past few weeks downloaded probably every single game where you can kill American soldiers.
His most recent rant which I had to listen to was 3 days ago and it was about how ‘‘westerners destroyed/ruined Godzilla’’, it went on and on for an entire hour however unbelievable that sounds and it was… interesting to say the least… Certainly more so than his usual constant rants about vampires in western media. I’m not into Godzilla and I just casually watched a couple of movies some years ago and so I didn’t understand more than half the stuff he said.
He has a brother and sister, I’ve been hanging around with his brother almost just as much as with him during school and he’s pretty much the same in opinions except he’s level headed and doesn’t have bursts of anger. His older sister also shares same opinions, is extremely LGBT phobic, goes on rants and introduced him to Terrifier movies, so that’s all you need to know about her sanity. So family isn’t going to help in this in any way.
I know him since 2012, we grew up together and am extremely saddened to see him go from a silly guy with dark humor to this… Since he’s been here for years, you probably know how he was online unlike me, so please, If you have some advice or any way to help, to bring him back and talk to him, tell me, why did this happen to him all of a sudden.
Thank you in advance.
Kirby went on several unhinged rants insulting other members of our communities and by the look of your post he has 1) not learned a fucking thing in the meantime and 2) is not sorry about his behavior, so personally I see no reason to unban
Agree. This space will not benefit him or other users, especially trans comrades, in his current state.
He needs to seek professional help. Remember, Lemmy, any kind of social media are not a way to address mental health problems. Months ago, I survived some mental health problems without discussing it even further, and softly and indirectly sought professional help to address some of my concerns.
The problem is that he doesn’t think he needs it in the first place.
i know this might be hard to hear and it might sound cruel, but if that’s the case the only thing that will force him to become aware of his need for help is, in fact, deteriorating conditions to the point where there is no other option but for him to become more self-aware. your job is not to tell him what he needs (people always have to help themselves first and foremost), but to support him as much as you can through that process. at best you can slightly nudge someone in the right direction. truly, best of luck to you
If a person is spiraling, emotionally unstable and prone to saying extreme things that will likely lead to conflict and argument and could even attract unwanted attention from the feds, then perhaps this is not the right place for them at this point in time. We are a welcoming community and we try to help as best we can when someone is struggling but there are limits to what we can do. Online spaces are not a replacement for IRL community and IRL help, especially online spaces focused around discussing politics which are likely to exacerbate distress and anxiety. A certain amount of emotional stability is required to be able to have calm discussions, engage in self-reflection, and accept criticism without defensively lashing out. They are still free to lurk of course. You don’t necessarily need to actively engage with a site like this to get something valuable and educational out of it.
He never did anything illegal, but is definitely prone to anger. I’ve suggested it because he doesn’t have any community space left. The main thing is the fact that he doesn’t think that he needs help in the first place, as I said, his family is the way it is so there’s no way to do anything despite the fact that we’re close in real life. I really don’t know what to do at this point and that’s why I asked for advice.
Not that I don’t feel you, but I’m unsure how much help the community can be if he’s that unstable and doesn’t want to listen to diverging opinions. I know he’s probably in a tough situation economically and that’s why this is the second best bet, but he clearly needs professional help, not a communist forum. Just my two cents, though.
Maybe by having someone to talk to him who’s on the same page politically would help considering that especially in a few past months, it’s been rough and his condition worsened under these circumstances. I’m also for him getting any help, but the problem is that he doesn’t think he needs it in the first place. Not to mention his family members whom I mentioned who are either the same or far worse.
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He never mentioned LGBT in one of his rants these past months and I confidently say that whatever opinions he had were definitely influenced by his older sister.
Kirby talked down to me while spouting men’s rights talking points and also denied ever saying anything transphobic in the same thread. Considering the fact that he didn’t tell you anything about his ban I doubt he has reflected even in the slightest about it. I am personally not comfortable having him back, because he seemed to take it upon himself to take over every thread at the time that was about queerness or sexism, choking out the possibility for anyone learning or understanding about them while at the same time making it unsafe for queer and femme comrades. Can you honestly tell me that he wouldn’t do that again?
There are a couple comrades on this thread who have said that they would be fine with having him back, and while I usually appreciate their analysis, I am a bit skeptical of their seriousness to combat transphobia as a result.
He didn’t mention it, but from my personal experience with him irl, he never had anything against LGBT, we had one gay classmate during school and he was completely cool with him, unlike his older sister. He’s definitely not sexist considering that he’s always advocating for gender equality and called males who I quote ‘‘don’t have a wife who is dominant’’ pussies so.
He never mentioned LGBT in one of his rants these past months and I confidently say that whatever opinions he had were definitely influenced by his older sister.
I’m sorry, but saying he wasn’t queerphobic around you does not address the issue when you were just presented with a litany of examples of a pattern of behavior over time. We don’t know you, we don’t know your ability to address or identify queerphobia, and we have experienced a very different person from the one you described as articulated in the many queerphobic things he has said that have been linked here.
It’s not that I don’t feel bad for someone having a mental crisis. It’s very serious and he should get help. But that’s also not a good reason to let him back into a community in which he has caused harm, especially when there’s no discernible proof of him having grown and learned from the harm he has caused.
I know him since 2012, he never had anything against people of different sexual orientation, even though that wasn’t a big thing here and was looked down upon when we went to school together, he himself is an asexual, so I can certainly say that unlike his sister, he was never homophobic.
This is the last time I will reply to you because it doesn’t seem like anything anyone is saying about his behavior is resonating with you. You believe he’s not, but we have provided proof that he is multiple times to the point that he became hostile. It shows a lack of respect for queer, trans, and intersex comrades for you to be repeatedly shown proof and then turn around and say he’s not. You didn’t write those words, we didn’t write those words, he did - and this is one of the last corners of the internet where we can exist without our existence being called into question with no consequences. If I recall, this isn’t the first time you’ve asked. I’m asking you to respect that he caused harm to this community and unless he does self-crit and grows (which he hasn’t), you shouldn’t expect him to be welcomed back.
I’ve just read it, he never even mentioned gay people, he was talking about his LGBT phobic family members and how there is 2 genders/sexes, so how exactly did you come to conclusion that he himself homophobic?
If that’s your conclusion then you were never equipped to have this conversation in the first place. I’m sure somebody will be willing to explain it to you, but I’m not.
Ok then, show me exactly where did he said something homophobic? I didn’t see where did he insult gay people.
In my opinion, you are being intentionally obtuse and have the capability and resources to gather information, listen to others and come to your own conclusions.
You are being presented with multiple links to his comments, modlogs and various other inflammatory actions, yet you continuously deflect blame or debate on what is “homophobic” instead of looking at the obvious; calling those born outside of the social “sex binary” deformed and you don’t come to any conclusion of your own that there might be something beyond that? Specifically, beyond that train of thought?
Instead of coming to any conclusion with the evidence you have, you deflect blame onto his family and debate-pervert about what’s “Homophobic”?
Like come on.
Do you even know what homophobia is? It’s a hatred and discrimination against gay and bisexual people.
I didn’t see where exactly did my friend say anything against them, just as he never did in real life. The only thing I saw from this is that he said that there are 2 genders and for some reason talked about people who are born with different sexual organs. Please tell me where is homophobia in this?
what is “homophobic” instead of looking at the obvious; calling those born outside of the social “sex binary” deformed
“Homophobia” can be used as a general slang for discrimination against LGBTQ. It has further connotations and extension of the word in certain situations; just like how other pejoratives evolve from words that have, yes, an objective use-form. Let’s try and think a little harder here, alright?
LGBTQ is lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans and queer, he didn’t tell anything about lesbian, gay, bi or trans people. What was the problem?
“leftist” “Wants Yellowstone to explode” Do you mean blackstone or is it seriously yellowstone? Keep him away from posadism lmao
Yes, Yellowstone, the supervolacno
I agree. Although his idea of sex was questionable, a permanent ban is too long for a user who has made plenty of fine contributions; I think that five months is long enough for him to learn his lesson. I wouldn’t trust him with moderator privileges again, but as an ordinary user we should give him a second chance. Undo the ban.
He definitely deserves a respite from this. And from what I’ve read in reasons he was banned, I can say that even though he said all the stuff I stated and can be intense, he isn’t and was never transphobic nor LGBT phobic in general.
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Especially Twitter, vile stuff is happening there since Elon Musk brought it a couple years back.
oh, i remember him… i don’t remember why he was banned, but in comments seems that he probably was being venomously transphobic and kinda agressive. maybe he should be unbanned if he promises to behave
This is the most obvious alt I have ever seen lmao
The magical friend who shows up 14 hours after Kirby’s ban, no posts or comments beyond this one, and the same speech mannerisms
If only he was smart enough to seek help he needs and knew he needs it in the first place.
He was banned in summer, not recently, it’s been months and the only reason I came here is because I’m running out of options. But anyhow, you can rest assured that he won’t be coming back here considering his reaction when he found through a friend on Discord that I posted this.
Kirbywithawhip?
I think the last few weeks in particular have been stressful.
I really liked him. We were online friends or at least friendly to one another. It’s a shame that he was banned from here.
I want them back.
Yes, that’s him, he was banned few months ago, I think in summer.
That’s great to hear, since New Year it’s been really rough for him so if he had someone to talk to and a safe space, he’d definitely feel better. If you can, ask whoever had a beef with him here to bring him.
Hey, could you give me their Discord handle?
I was a good friend with them.
freddy9853
It may definitely help him if you two reconnected.
Thank you so much! I really missed him.
