today I wanted to sew up a hole in the shirt I wanted to wear so I sat at the sewing machine shirtless so that every time I would try to get up to go do something else, my tits being out would remind me oh yeah I want to sew this fucking hole in the shirt before I do anything fucking else.
unfortunately I wasn’t able to finish setting up the sewing machine before my roommate needed me for something, so I just put on the shirt. it still has a hole. 😑
I do a similar thing with mowing the lawn. I pull the lawnmower out and sit down to have a cigarette. Eventually I’ll get annoyed enough at seeing the lawnmower that I’ll just do the work.
This took so much time for my wife to understand. “But you see $THING everyday!”, “Yes, and that’s why I don’t see it anymore”. She probably still doesn’t understand-understand, but she kind of knows.
Yeah, that’s why it’s so annoying when people say “leave a note somewhere!” or “make a list!”
Like, those notes and lists would quickly just become part of the background noise. And then they say “You’re just making excuses! You didn’t even try it!”
I mean, do you really think I’m just pulling this out of my ass as if I’ve never tried that before? Like I’m just too stupid to think of that myself, and no one has ever suggested it before, and your advice is the first time I’m ever hearing of this “leave a note” trick? No, I’ve fucking tried everything and learned from experience what works and what doesn’t, and that’s why I’m so resigned to my fate now.
Or do I really need to try again every time someone new says “Just use a post-it note!”, and act like I’m trying it for the first time to “keep an open mind.”
Same thing with all that other BS neurotypical advice, like “Just go to the gym”/“Start a healthy routine”/“Find a hobby”/“Just go out and talk to people and make more friends.”
Like, mf stop! I’ve tried it all. It doesn’t work. Even if you think it works for “normal people,” guess what? I’m not “normal people!”
And then they say “You seem pretty normal to me.”
Like yeah, just go ahead and invalidate my entire life experience of dealing with an invisible and incurable disability, because YOU can’t see at a glance what a personal living hell it can be. All that tells me is that I’ve done an effective job at masking so as not to make the NTs uncomfortable, when really all it does is make it harder to find reasonable accomodations when I really need them.
This reminds me of how I force myself to go to the laundromat. I put all my dirty laundry into bags and set them between my bed and the door. Even when I want to be lazy, seeing those bags there and having to walk by them to leave will eventually make me think, “Fuck it, just get it over with.”
Also, for cleaning pots and pans after cooking - I start by putting them in the sink. Then I think, “I should add soapy water at least, so it’ll be easier to clean.” I add the soapy water, then think, “I should scrub the top parts, where the water isn’t reaching.” Then after that I go, “You know what, I’d rather not have to come back and finish this later. Just wash the whole damn thing.”
I considered it but she’s uncharacteristically uncomfortable with nudity (for a European) and also what she needed help with was installing the air conditioner so I begrudgingly conceded that was more important than fixing the shirt, given it was 90 °F. I wouldn’t have wanted AC dirt all over my tits either. Oh also I suppose that would have been tits in front of the open window which is considered rather impolite to the neighbors
today I wanted to sew up a hole in the shirt I wanted to wear so I sat at the sewing machine shirtless so that every time I would try to get up to go do something else, my tits being out would remind me oh yeah I want to sew this fucking hole in the shirt before I do anything fucking else.
unfortunately I wasn’t able to finish setting up the sewing machine before my roommate needed me for something, so I just put on the shirt. it still has a hole. 😑
I do a similar thing with mowing the lawn. I pull the lawnmower out and sit down to have a cigarette. Eventually I’ll get annoyed enough at seeing the lawnmower that I’ll just do the work.
I have this feature where my brain blocks out the presence of the lawn mower. Now it’s just a part of how a lawn looks like.
This took so much time for my wife to understand. “But you see $THING everyday!”, “Yes, and that’s why I don’t see it anymore”. She probably still doesn’t understand-understand, but she kind of knows.
Yeah, that’s why it’s so annoying when people say “leave a note somewhere!” or “make a list!”
Like, those notes and lists would quickly just become part of the background noise. And then they say “You’re just making excuses! You didn’t even try it!”
I mean, do you really think I’m just pulling this out of my ass as if I’ve never tried that before? Like I’m just too stupid to think of that myself, and no one has ever suggested it before, and your advice is the first time I’m ever hearing of this “leave a note” trick? No, I’ve fucking tried everything and learned from experience what works and what doesn’t, and that’s why I’m so resigned to my fate now.
Or do I really need to try again every time someone new says “Just use a post-it note!”, and act like I’m trying it for the first time to “keep an open mind.”
Same thing with all that other BS neurotypical advice, like “Just go to the gym”/“Start a healthy routine”/“Find a hobby”/“Just go out and talk to people and make more friends.”
Like, mf stop! I’ve tried it all. It doesn’t work. Even if you think it works for “normal people,” guess what? I’m not “normal people!”
And then they say “You seem pretty normal to me.”
Like yeah, just go ahead and invalidate my entire life experience of dealing with an invisible and incurable disability, because YOU can’t see at a glance what a personal living hell it can be. All that tells me is that I’ve done an effective job at masking so as not to make the NTs uncomfortable, when really all it does is make it harder to find reasonable accomodations when I really need them.
Yup, my massage chair agrees that it’s a table.
This reminds me of how I force myself to go to the laundromat. I put all my dirty laundry into bags and set them between my bed and the door. Even when I want to be lazy, seeing those bags there and having to walk by them to leave will eventually make me think, “Fuck it, just get it over with.”
Also, for cleaning pots and pans after cooking - I start by putting them in the sink. Then I think, “I should add soapy water at least, so it’ll be easier to clean.” I add the soapy water, then think, “I should scrub the top parts, where the water isn’t reaching.” Then after that I go, “You know what, I’d rather not have to come back and finish this later. Just wash the whole damn thing.”
And that’s how I manage to clean my pots/dishes.
You jusr need to commit harder. Roommate needs help? Tits out or wait for me to sew this shit
I considered it but she’s uncharacteristically uncomfortable with nudity (for a European) and also what she needed help with was installing the air conditioner so I begrudgingly conceded that was more important than fixing the shirt, given it was 90 °F. I wouldn’t have wanted AC dirt all over my tits either. Oh also I suppose that would have been tits in front of the open window which is considered rather impolite to the neighbors
Well, we are on the internet and I don’t want to hear your reasonable and nuanced arguments! /s
Yeah, sometimes things just go that way and we have to do our best to come back to it later.
That was 5 years ago… It still has a hole