This is outrageous. Where are the armed men who come in to take the substituters away? Where are they? This kind of behavior is never tolerated in Boraqua. You cook like that, they put you in jail. Right away. No trial, no nothing. Bakers? We have a special jail for bakers. You’re leaving out ingredients? Right to jail. You’re editing Michelin Star recipes? Right to jail. Right away. You’re whisking too fast? Jail. Slow? Jail. You’re adding too much butter for cakes, pastries, you right to jail. You undercook flan, believe it or not, jail. You overcook quiche, also jail. Undercook, overcook. You make an appointment with the food delivery and you don’t show up? Believe it or not, jail, right away. We have the best cooks in the world, because of jail.
“Hello, Kaeyghleigh, I’d like to play a game. Next to you are two buttons. One will set the oven to 80F for 350 minutes, the other 350F for 80 minutes. To survive, you’ll need to follow instructions carefu-- [whooshing noise as the gas flames flare up in the oven]. Okay, that was fast.”
It might sound totally insane but this is barely an exaggeration with some of the ones you see submitted there (and I mean ones that aren’t jokes).
They will absolutely make tons of substitutions and still rate the recipe based on it. It’s infuriating and should be illegal.
This is outrageous. Where are the armed men who come in to take the substituters away? Where are they? This kind of behavior is never tolerated in Boraqua. You cook like that, they put you in jail. Right away. No trial, no nothing. Bakers? We have a special jail for bakers. You’re leaving out ingredients? Right to jail. You’re editing Michelin Star recipes? Right to jail. Right away. You’re whisking too fast? Jail. Slow? Jail. You’re adding too much butter for cakes, pastries, you right to jail. You undercook flan, believe it or not, jail. You overcook quiche, also jail. Undercook, overcook. You make an appointment with the food delivery and you don’t show up? Believe it or not, jail, right away. We have the best cooks in the world, because of jail.
Jail is too lenient! Death penalty!
[Door to walk-in oven slams shut]
“Hello, Kaeyghleigh, I’d like to play a game. Next to you are two buttons. One will set the oven to 80F for 350 minutes, the other 350F for 80 minutes. To survive, you’ll need to follow instructions carefu-- [whooshing noise as the gas flames flare up in the oven]. Okay, that was fast.”