Joke aside, it’ll only work implying that they have to use the same computer. Anyone tech savvy enough will know that it’s trivial to put an unencrypted drive in another machine and read it.
dwm suckless zen gentoo gigatron trilonaire elonmusknuker arm for the win
Riverwm for the win
Only encrypt your sensitive data.
Absolutely perfect. I was traveling with a friend and we decided to watch a movie I had on my hard drive. Once I booted into i3 and I had to use a couple key chords to navigate, they said, “Your computer gives me anxiety.” 😂
Same person almost shit their pants when I replaced
youtu.be
withyewtu.be
in a URL to get a region locked video to play. I am a bonafide hacker in their eyes.My idiot brother, who fancies himself a tech guru… because he reads the
newsmarketing around the tech specs of new console releases every couple of years…Legitimately thought I was hacking into our own ISP when I opened a terminal infront of him to configure a VPN setting that didn’t yet have an option to do so in the GUI.
Lile he tried to have an ‘intervention’ with me over it.
For … running a few commands to check my existing and active network interfaces, then glancing at a webpage and starting the vpn process with an extra flag or two.
I was completely unable to convince him that I hadn’t done anything even remotely close to like pen-testing the local DNS server… which is what he… seemed? to think I was doing?
Gotta love incredibly overconfident + incompetent people.
…
I have also had people at cellphone shops either get angry at me for mentioning outloud, or try to hide the fact that you can plug a phone with a broken screen into a usb hub, and then their own keyboard, monitor and mouse, in certain situations, and be able to log in to the phone to do inane parts of their recovery or migration processes … when your screen is borked, but the phone itself is still functional.
I had employee guy laugh at the notion this would work, another guy say sure you can try it, and then got angry that it worked, and another act like I was performing some kind of dark magic that the other customers in the store could not be allowed to know about.
…
EDIT: Oh I forgot to mention the abominable absurdity of my brother trying to give me an ‘intervention’ over anything, at all, ever.
See, while I was
studying the bladegetting two simultaneous bachelors degrees from the best Uni in the state, he was going to raves, giving himself serotonin shock syndrome, all while functionally being homeless.Multiple times in my life I have had to drop everything I was doing and prevent him from carrying out a very credible suicide threat, or save him from ODing.
Myself on the other hand, … uh, no nothing like that, and I’d not even given him an ‘intervention’ after saving him from an OD or two.
Anyway, I’m fairly sure I could drive him back to drug use if I somehow forced him to learn how some of the R code I used and wrote for statistical analysis actually works, or the same for any of the insane spider webs of 200, 300 line custom, one-off SQL queries I often had to write in various data analyst positions before they let me restructure their DBs a bit into something less insane.
Yeesh. I relate fully to the brother part. Mine also likes to pretend, but at least isn’t that oblivious about the terminal. Intervention, though?! LMAO
“Friends don’t let friends Gentoo”, or something
He has an extremely thin skin, a massive inferiority complex, somehow has worse social skills than myself, despite me being autistic and him not… I could go on, but I already added more in an edit to my above post.
So anyway I went no contact with my entire dysfunctional family (they’re all this magnitude of nuts but in their own special ways) years ago rofl, my mental health has never been better.
I was installing Alpine Linux on a Raspberry Pi 5 and was using the kitchen TV as a temporary monitor. My parents thought I was sending encrypted messages. I was just updating the repository list to find the quickest mirror.
It’s funny to me how some people see text scrolling by on a screen and immediately think witchcraft.
I used to do something similar when I was working in embedded systems, specifically because my superiors had no idea. I would just put our OS up to compile on repeat so one if my machines was always spitting out nonsense (but vaguely related to work).
“Sorry boss, just waiting on the new build to finish up so I can start on that.”
Used to keep a terminal sesh up that was just scrolling
top
on the dev server whenever I felt like being lazy while looking productive. Took my very tech savvy boss a couple months before he finally noticed.I’m pretty sure the VP of engineering knew what I was up to, but I think he also understood that I didn’t get paid enough to be as neurotic as he was and I generally got stuff done ahead of schedule any way.
Hollywood fucked over everyone
Ok, so I happen to be the paragon of security through obscurity.
- Linux
- Sway
- Dvorak layout
- Mechanical keyboard c̄ blank keycaps
Come at me bruh
Linux+i3+emacs+dvorak+querty_mech_kbd
damn it. I am “one of those dudes”
The last 2 can be mitigated by just plugging in a different keyboard, the second one by just pulling the drive, the first doesn’t really need mitigation, but nothing a $5 wrench won’t solve.
This guy xkcds:
gets hit with wrench
cums “h-harder daddy~”
“well shit, now wtf do we do?”
“if you don’t give the password I’m gonna stop” 🤷♂️
“B-but I’m into orgasm denial too” 🥺
After that point, you don’t want to know what is in the laptop anyway
But, that’s also when morbid curiosity kicks in~
“h-harder daddy~”
That was the exact password.
You can stop now
The key map tends to apply to all keyboards.
Depends on your keyboard. I have the kind where you can quick switch with a key combination.
I guess it’s possible for the keyboard itself to handle that, but I’ve set that up in the OS on both windows and Linux machines. And when I replaced a shitty keyboard with a better one just a little while ago, it had Dvorak already as the default layout.
Yeah of course. That’s how I did it when I tried Dvorak a couple of years ago too. Just mentioning that stuff is possible today.
“My $5 wrench says you better start installing Windows.”
“Sure thing, just let me wipe the drive in the process…”
Keymap isn’t going to change automatically by plugging in a new keyboard…
I used my own modified colemak layout for some time.
Apparently I am too…
- Linux (NixOS BTW)
- Also Sway
- Colemak
- Mechanical keyboard, but the key caps are still QWERTY.
Hey, me too!
My keycaps are Morse code
Switching to Dvorak caused the gratifying result of people that would just start trying to use your keyboard without being absolutely befuddled.
Bonus points: use non-qwerty keyboard for added obfuscation (but keep the qwerty key caps of course).
As I’m French, I do the contrary: international QWERTY layout on AZERTY physical keyboard. I want to switch to an ergonomic layout like ergo-l though, but it’s hard to learn.
The computing equivalent of a stick shift.
Wouldn’t that be something that makes you manually tile your windows? Or are you making fun of i3 for not properly placing tiling windows to split the active one in half along the longer side?
If only you could start it with a dead battery!
I love this. I just wish we could use a different meme format, I am tired of seeing that dudes face.
I love but it!
Hero
I agree. There are so many available now.
Fixed the image for you
the real fix would have been the removal of drake
Ah thanks man, could you add some left/right padding as well?
Yeah, no problem
This is like me when I try to use my wife’s iPhone. Where are the buttons? How do I exit the app?
try finger but edge
(my android phones don’t have buttons and haven’t for years)
When in doubt, swipe up
multi step authentication flows that are customizable for each user would be kinda cool if that doesn’t exist already.
not too crazy like two factor authentication, just patterns or puzzles to arrange in different ways.
so every time someone tries to access an account, the authentication process is different every time
It opens up a page of my handwriting and it must be translated in order to unlock the computer. Even the most powerful linguist in the world couldn’t crack it.
delightfully horrifying
I love sway :3
Sway is fine. I still prefer i3 because I still use many X applications.
Now for this meme specifically, sway and i3wm are actually easy to understand once you know the basic key chords. Sway in particular can also allow drag and drop to tile manually without shortcuts.
Dwm though is a nightmare for Linux beginners let alone those who never use Linux before. I3 needs a .config file, so newbies can read it and figure out the key bindings. On Dwm? It doesnt need one because the system can just run the compiled dwm executable. So if you really want to make it more secure: configure dwm to your likings => compile it => delete the source folder. Nobody will know wtf is going on, except you.
i3 can also drag and drop to tile, iirc.
This is downright funny. Thank you for sharing!