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Joined 1 个月前
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Cake day: 2026年2月4日

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  • Would the Trump administration lie?

    We will release the Epstein files

    I have the Epstein files on my desk

    All of the files have already been released

    There are no files, never were

    There are files but they exonerate everyone on our side and implicate all of our opponents. No you can’t see them, just trust us bro.

    Why are you still talking about the Epstein files?

    The files are a democrat hoax… But they still exonerate Trump somehow

    Okay here’s the files, but Trump isn’t in there once.

    Okay we removed the 10,000 mentions of trump that we missed.

    Stop talking about this, Dow is over 50k!

    World War III is no time to discuss the Epstein files


  • You’re absolutely right! I told you to bomb Iran without considering all of the obvious fallout. That’s on me, and in the future I’ll do more to accurately convey the potential ramifications of any foreign policy decisions I suggest.

    In the meantime, I can help you spin this disaster. Let me know if you want me to:

    🦅 Help draft a propaganda piece smearing any detractors as unpatriotic

    💣 Generate an image that looks like satellite imagery of a weapons grade uranium enrichment facility

    👶 Organize a hangout with your friends to help blow off some steam

    Just let me know what you’d like me to get started on. And remember, you got this!