This is happening as Russia is actively feeding intelligence to Iran so they can kill even more Americans in a war no Americans wanted or asked for that we’re fighting on behalf of Israel. Way to go, MAGA, your America first, no more wars, president of peace is knocking it outta the park.

about 90% of articles about climate change have something to that effect

And the other 10% are like “guys we may have passed the point of no return years ago”

I have a plan to get AGI, Arthur! I just need another trillion dollars! Another trillion dollars and some god-damned faith!

Well the DNC certainly wouldn’t want to look rude by politically capitalizing on this, so instead they’ll let us know they’re “deeply concerned” and carry on with their day.

You think anon is fit enough to make it through boot camp? He’d be more at home in ice.

The guy used spray-on hair before a TV interview. We don’t need to do anything to make him look goofy.

As a parent, I’ve been on the receiving end of many blowouts

Would the Trump administration lie?

We will release the Epstein files

I have the Epstein files on my desk

All of the files have already been released

There are no files, never were

There are files but they exonerate everyone on our side and implicate all of our opponents. No you can’t see them, just trust us bro.

Why are you still talking about the Epstein files?

The files are a democrat hoax… But they still exonerate Trump somehow

Okay here’s the files, but Trump isn’t in there once.

Okay we removed the 10,000 mentions of trump that we missed.

Stop talking about this, Dow is over 50k!

World War III is no time to discuss the Epstein files

You’re absolutely right! I told you to bomb Iran without considering all of the obvious fallout. That’s on me, and in the future I’ll do more to accurately convey the potential ramifications of any foreign policy decisions I suggest.

In the meantime, I can help you spin this disaster. Let me know if you want me to:

🦅 Help draft a propaganda piece smearing any detractors as unpatriotic

💣 Generate an image that looks like satellite imagery of a weapons grade uranium enrichment facility

👶 Organize a hangout with your friends to help blow off some steam

Just let me know what you’d like me to get started on. And remember, you got this!

I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m obviously not gonna steal anything. Sure, accidents happen from time to time. The supermarket decided to replace their cashiers with self checkout operated by random non-employees, after all. If I happen to ring up filet mignon as a Roma tomato, I think that’s just the inevitable result of outsourcing your labor to untrained civilians with no incentive to accurately do the job .

But what about all the honor and glory that comes with dying for an oil company’s bottom line? Or dying to distract the public from the fact that the president is a child rapist?

The term for this is protein poisoning or protein toxicity. Less formally, rabbit starvation.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Protein_toxicity

That’s a completely separate discussion. We’re talking about gender dysphoria, not schizophrenia. I hope you understand why people assume you’re a troll, because what is even the point of bringing that up in this context?

Somewhere around the majority of people employed in academia are absolutely useless.

“POV: You’re doing something”

(Looks inside)

A meme that is showing a third person view of someone else doing something

🙂 <-- me after witnessing otherworldly horrors that are beyond my comprehension (I couldn’t comprehend them)

“Eggs are down 400%”

-The moron in chief

Hundreds of billions is a more accurate figure. You could’ve also said they’re worth multiple dollars and had been correct.

No need to slop up the place

It’s just that the pressure to make the “correct” choice is fucking crazy.

I feel pressured to only ever present as a cisgendered heterosexual person regardless of whether that’s correct or not. The pressure is for LGBTQ+ people to simply disappear from public society. Correct has nothing to do with it.