I read that as “Poland”. I thought “Hey, I’ve seen this one!”

HEY! LISTEN!

More for me! Hey, by chance, have you ever wanted to become a sausage? You’re Sausage Clox!!!

Damn. I clicked it thinking amazon was selling the shirt.

I did that when I first gof here. Now I call them “that place with the shirt that goes hard”

I’d like that shirt.

George Carlin routines always feel relevant and fresh. The reason is he didn’t jump into specifics of Reagan or Clinton. He talked about general behaviors of government and society.

The reason his material always seems current despite him being dead for almost 2 decades is that we as a country never got our shit together and fixed the issues.

Then there’s me.

Phone is fine. Never had a case.

Actually, if Luigi wins, Mario still wins. There’s 3 Marios. Mario Mario, and Luigi Mario.

Check the manual for Super Mario Bros. The original on NES.

Mario is described as “The hero of our story (maybe)”

Which is kind of a weird way to describe the main character.

90s Conan was also great.

Elden Ring has been praised by everyone.

It’s one thing if a reviewer says it’s good. His livelyhood relies on the video game industry thriveing. If you stop buying this game, the studio won’t make the next game. If the studio won’t make the next game, the reviewer can’t review the next game. If the reviewer can’t review the next game, then where does their paycheck come from?

So I’m not saying they knowingly artificially raise scores and sell games. I’m just saying maybe a 7 gets reviewed as an 8 just so the reviewer won’t feel awkward when meeting with industry folk at the next industry get together.

But when gamers collectively band together, and say itxs 10/10, and game of the year, I feel rest assured that Elden Ring is as good as people say.

I have not bought Elden Ring. I have not played Elden Ring. In all honesty, I probably won’t. Why?

BECAUSE YOU DON’T NEED TO PLAY EVERY SINGLE GAME JUST BECAUSE IT’S AMAZING!!! YOU CAN JUST NOOOOOT PLAY IT!

Don’t blame too many games. Don’t blame reviewers. Don’t blame anything. This is only a problem if you let it control your life. Variety is good for everybody. Some games you can just let others enjoy. I’m glad Elden Ring is so great. I don’t feel bad I missed it. I’m happy for you if you loved it.

Isn’t that so much healthier of an attitude to have?

But his name was Bowser! You know…like the Nintendo character!

Yeah, past the first week of funny headlines I never thought of him again.

Variety! Give this man (Man? Woman?)

GIVE THIS PERSON THE JOB! They’re clearly better at it.

The year? Oh it’s 6363. No. That’s not right. It’s 1843. No. That’s not it.

…would you believe it’s actually the entire timeline that’s fucked? Every year is fucked!

1990s =/= 1920s.

Entirely different decade in fact.

Ok…then we’re surrounded by people who fuck up the planet.

Hey, you DO see that humans, and only humans, have fucked this planet up pretty badly, right?

Like we’re already past the point of no return for climate change. We can’t unfuck the planet.

So why is it hard to believe that the majority of people are huge fuck-ups in life? Including you.

Needs a bigger font. I want it seen from space. Like the great wall of china.