The gooner would have great strength. But only in one arm.

Same as every weekend - doing my damndest to avoid any activity whatsoever.

When I was a child I saw a school mate get crushed by a falling piano.

True story.

UK here. I get 30 days paid leave a year, and will have 2 or 3 weeks away on vacation throughout the year and use the rest of the days for just chilling.

My employer will literally hassle me to use all the days, and is not happy if I don’t take my full entitlement.

Uk here. Peep Show, Black adder, Dad’s Army and The Sopranos.

I did hate X but am off that cesspit now. I hate hate hate what Facebook has become. I can now only bear to go on there about once a month and everytime I get angry as fuck.

I miss MySpace.

Yes I can. And disagree with virtually everyone else; I think that this along with virtually everything else by Dickens is absolutely top class writing. The meaning of every individual phrase isn’t the point, the whole passage just gives the perfect impression of the scene he is trying to convey. Also, remember much of Dickens’ stuff was written to be read out loud. Try that, it helps!

This is your safe place 😊

I’d happily let you have them all :)

I’ve hated Harry Potter since the first book came out - someone lent it to me and I gave up after 100 pages cos it was shite and really badly written.

Why would my wife need pockets when she has 82 zillion designer handbags?

The loudest fastest music on my playlist

Good man 👍

My local pub sells pepperami behind the bar. I swirl it in the beer so it gets a good amount of beery glaze then… Er… Suck it off. Then do it some more, and swallow it. And yes I know exactly how that sounds.

I’d be concerned that my own chatbot might get jealous

You’re supposed to clean it? 😂

Oh I feel you. Until I was diagnosed with sleep apnoea and put on Cpap my life was a hellscape of brain fog and exhaustion.

I’m (partially) blind and (partially) deaf. People seem to think you can either see and hear, or you can’t. The fact that I often can’t hear or see something just seems to annoy people.

Pepperami and beer

I have seen a number of girls do that tbf. You are not alone (unless each time it was actually you)