• TotallynotJessica@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOPM
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      2 days ago
      1. the girl is nobody in particular
      2. The joke is that HRT will crush any ability transfems have to pass as a man, all while giving a cute smile (as not looking like a man is exactly what the transfems were seeking through HRT)
  • compostgoblin@piefed.blahaj.zone
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    4 days ago

    My boy mode keeps getting less and less convincing… and I love it lol

    It does make me feel like I should probably hurry up and finish coming out to everyone who doesn’t know yet, before people start figuring it out on their own 😬

    • jbunnie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 days ago

      Same, but coming out is so hard. I haven’t had a single good reaction, and a few horrible ones, I need new friends 😫

      • compostgoblin@piefed.blahaj.zone
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        4 days ago

        It’s so scary, isn’t it?! I’m sorry to hear your friends haven’t been supportive, you definitely deserve better

        I’ve been very fortunate that everyone I’ve come out to so far has been really positive and supportive. But I also started with all the “easy” ones: my queer and progressive friends, my therapist, etc. And I still have to figure out how to manage coming out to my conservative Catholic family, and at work.

        I feel like I’m spending so much time agonizing over what might happen, I just need to have it be done so I can deal with whatever actually does end up happening

        • gandalf_der_12te@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          2 days ago

          And I still have to figure out how to manage coming out to my conservative Catholic family

          easy: just tell them that you’ve decided that the ancient (christians love antiquity) beauty ideal of long, flowing hair and a female posture is superior after all and that you reject the modern, secular short haircut, etc.

        • That_Bitch_Is_Cily@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          4 days ago

          I started out with my safe ones as well. I’m really priveledged that I already had such amazing supportive friends and most of my family. Julia, I hope that you’re able to find better IRL friends or that your existing friends come around.

    • femtek@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 days ago

      I was wearing sports bras because going down the stairs hurt and still had only come out to 3 people at work. Lots has changed in the years since then though.

      • Honestly, I’m surprised I haven’t had many people notice (just one friend and a chaser and I think I’m coming up on 2 years since the chaser clocked me at work) and yet people continue to appear to be oblivious.

        • TotallynotJessica@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOPM
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          2 days ago

          People who knew you before have a tendency to not notice. Think about how other kids didn’t seem to change much when you were growing up, but if you looked back at old pictures, you’d notice the difference a few years made. People who are with you every day don’t notice the gradual shift and don’t update their perception of you unless you seriously compromise that image. They just see the same person they’ve always known, while new people meeting you have a fresh perspective.

          • I’m not that surprised by the people who regularly see me. Its the people who haven’t seen me before. I’ve had a case of people who last saw me a few years before I started HRT not recognize me despite me hanging out with my siblings in our parents house (just like the last time I saw them), so I know its not just me who thinks I look quite a bit different.

            But looking more like my sister than myself 4 years doesn’t translate to people gendering me as anything but a guy even if they’ve never met me before. TBF, I’m an NB, I often have facial hair, I haven’t really voice trained, and my presentation certainly isn’t feminine.

  • Nulliza@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    4 days ago

    My partners mother literally said “well there were signs” when they told her i was trans. I am still so confused as to what she meant with this.