Don’t need an LLM to know the date ended ten seconds after they explained they were going to record the conversation for performance review
Don’t need an LLM to know the date ended ten seconds after they explained they were going to record the conversation for performance review
Yes and no. I get the point ,to check for available people". But, leaving the commercial model behind most platforms and its lack of interest in finding you a partner aside, it tempts people to make a long mental list of what they’d want in a partner and to weed out anyone who doesn’t meet those criteria. Among other things, online profiles (in my opinion) lead us to judge people more heavily on their appearance than we normally would. And this is where my criticism comes in: It’s very likely that we’re ruling out a lot of people with whom we might have been happy, but who don’t meet the expectations on our list or our visual standards within the first 10 seconds. In this regard, meeting people in real life works better because we tend to engage more deeply with them (partly due to the smaller selection) than we do when briefly scanning a 10-word online profile with 5 pictures.
Personally, I probably would have ruled out my partner—whom I met at a bar—if I’d met her online, simply because my online behavior is much more superficial (which doesn’t reflect well on me, but I think that’s the case for a lot of people.)
In my experience we also dismiss a massive number of people subconsciously in person, where seeing someone in passing is basically like the swiping step. Actually going on a date is the same in both approaches.
Actively dismissing might reinforce our visual biases, but as a trade off of being aware of more people who are interested in having a relationship.
Let me just jump in here for a moment:
That’s the theory. In the real world of modern online dating (of course, this is all just anecdotal evidence from me and a few colleagues, so take it with a grain of salt), there are also a lot of people on dating platforms who, for a wide variety of reasons, aren’t emotionally available for a relationship at all. Some are looking for no-strings-attached fun, others are going through a breakup, and still others are seeking attention and validation… In any case, not everyone you’re matched with is actually interested in a relationship or even in getting to know someone seriously. I’d even go so far as to say that this realization causes a bit more pain online than (as you correctly pointed out) in real life—where this also happens—because the platform operators naturally cultivate the expectation that “true love” (whatever that may mean to you) is just a click away.
I think we can perhaps agree on the following summary:
In theory, a platform where all adults who are interested in a relationship and are self-reflective can meet is a great idea because it expands the pool of available partners and allows you to weed out your personal no-goes beforehand without wasting time. In reality, however, due to the business model, our modern society, and human nature, quite a few pitfalls.
…and perhaps I just suck at online dating and therefore advise against it. After all it’s a pretty personal topic. ^^
Those are all relationships. Not long term stable ones, sure, but they all fall under the relationship umbrella.
Depends on your definiton of relationship.
If we define the term broadly enough, every human interaction is a relationship because we have some kind of relationship with the individuals we interact with.
Or we could acknowledge there are sexual, romantic, and other relationships that are commonly between two people and called relationships in the context of dating instead of diving headfirst into hyperbole.
110% agree! Those are a few of the reasons I hate online dating–we give weight to too many things that truly don’t matter–including how someone looks in a photo that may have been poorly lit or been artificially staged or editted.
My current girlfriend wouldn’t have even made it past my explicit OLD filters, much less a subjective screening. All praise IRL!