I’m in the process of moving over all my photos etc. from Google-Photos to Immich, some pics dating back to 2006 So it’s 20 years of photos etc.
There is a LOT of photos mixed in there with me and ex’s where we went on trips and traveled together etc.
Pics where they are in group shots with friends, spicy pics, pics with family during Christmas etc.
I’m a bit conflicted about what do do with these.
Spicy pics should probably be deleted.
Pics where they happen to be in group shots with family or friends feel excessive to delete?
There’s a lot of great memories there, it’s a 20 year photo diary of things I’ve done in my life and places I’ve been. Do I delete any containing ex’s and lose those memories? How do I even begin to do this there are 20k photos mixed in over 20 years
We have AI now. Replace their face with your favorite actress or Danny DeVito.
I’d keep them, I deleted all of the pictures with an ex and now there’s a hole in my memories. NSFW depends on how you/the ex would feel about it I guess? I wouldn’t keep them in my main cloud backup, that’s for sure
I have kept everything except spicy pictures of me and my ex - even the ones wjere it’s only them 🤔
It is our memories, and it’s how I feel about them. but it’s hard to know whats right.
The only hesitation I have is if a future partner might feel weird that I have it. I wouldn’t care if they kept memories, so I guess they shouldn’t either
I’d probably feel differently if an ex were still in your life vs not. An ongoing reminder of that shared relationship could make someone a little insecure. If they are out of your life though? That’s just a documentary of your life. Everyone has a past.
I’m with others, delete the spicy and keep the rest. You had a life before whatever future partner you may have, it would be a major red flag to ask you to delete everything.
I’m the person who is still very good friends with an ex. I was very up front about it when I first started dating my current partner of 10+ years. If he had asked me to stop hanging with my friend and delete everything, I would have dropped partner immediately.
Personally, I’d keep, at worse putting in some corner I don’t check often. Memories are still memories, and unless the person resents them, I don’t think they should be erased.
Erased… You’ve triggered my need to go watch Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.
I haven’t dated anyone else since the advent of worthwhile digital cameras, but I still have all my old love letters and photos in a box in storage. As long as I’m not taking them out regularly and digging wistfully, I don’t think my spouse minds.
Why do you want to delete them at all?
Thought a future partner might feel weird about me having them, I wouldn’t mind if they had pics like this, so they probably wouldn’t mind either. IDK
I also wouldn’t mind giving my future partner full access to my Immich once we’re very serious.
If someone demanded from me to sanitize my past, that would be a huge red flag:
Am I also not allowed to talk about any events I shared with former partners?Deleting the spicy pics is different, of course.
With those, the conversation shifts to “Why would you want to keep them?”Yea, That’s my feeling too.
I’d keep them. Why should you delete any of your own pictures in the first place?
That’s also what I’m feeling. It’s fun memories to stumble across every now and then
I’ve deleted the ones of abusive/traumatic exes, and kept the rest. It’s part of my history and who I am, and while some of them don’t deserve a place in my active memories, others don’t deserve to be as fully erased.
I made a backup of all the pics I deleted, threw them on a thumb drive labeled “bad memories”, and threw it in a box of very very old computer stuff (cables with no clear device, dongles that haven’t been compatible with anything in 15+ years, 27 sd adapters, etc. you know, garbage that hasn’t been thrown out). That way if I ever regret getting rid of them for whatever reason, I haven’t, but it’s also super clear I didn’t keep them for reminiscing.
Ultimately, do whatever makes you feel right. They are your pictures of your life and your memories, and if someone wants to get upset over things you did in the past, probably before you even knew them, that’s honestly a them problem, not a problem with anything you are doing. Like a new partner wanting you to get rid of your cat/dog/hamster because you got it with your ex.
I save the ones that are important memories I wanna hang onto for myself, and delete miscellaneous ones or extras
Delete the ones that make you feel bad, keep the rest. Gosh I gave you a Marie Kondo answer without realizing…
… personally I wouldn’t delete the group ones unless the rest of the group and experience was also unremarkable. As for the spicy ones, I might, depending on how I feel about the ex. This would vary widely depending on the breakup circumstances. I could also change my mind with time so I’d try to keep as many images as possible to begin with.
Dump the spice. Keep the rest.
