The world is on fire, so I guess the future being toast makes perfect sense.
Did you know there is a toaster from the 50’s which is totally mechanically automatic? It slowly lowers and raises the bread automatically, controls the darkening of the bread by measuring the slice’s temperature, and it is all powered by the thermal expansion of the heating coils themselves.
Ah, a fellow of culture I see. I also watch Technology Connections and also wish Radiant Control toasters were still a thing.
At work we have some boring toasters. It uses a dial for how well burned you want your bread. It works perfectly well. Purely electromechanical.
Why the fuck does it need this is beyond me.
It was $5 cheaper.
Now give up your email address, phone number, name, mailing address, and sign in to our app to burn your bread.
I also have a boring dial toaster. It was given to me by a couple who were afraid of it because it doesn’t pop up. You have to work a lever to get the toast out. Makes great toast.
tech enthusiasts be like: my house is soooo smart!
tech workers be like: Fuck that shit.
The more you know the less enthusiastic you get.
I wonder if future generations of toasters will require age verification since they are running an OS that can presumably get online? I hate it here, but luckily I have an analog toaster I intend to keep.
Maybe in the future during rolling blackouts caused by ai they’ll only permit a light toasting.
The brave little toaster agrees.
What kind of monster wants babies to play with the toaster? /s
volume, brightness, time and date… i dont need any of those things out of a toaster
It’s pretty useful to have a darkness control for the toast. That’s just a brightness control put on backwards
yeah thats what the dial is for
Reminds me of the novella Unauthorized Bread by Cory Doctorow.
Love that one. For anyone who hasn’t read it, this is the full text: https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/01/unauthorized-bread-a-near-future-tale-of-refugees-and-sinister-iot-appliances/
I have read this, would recomend.
The “revolution” written under the screen is just the cherry on top. (+ the irony of my comment saying a thing that is on the bottom of the screen is “the cherry on top”.)
This can’t be real. I refuse to look it up. I’m going to bed now
Anyone who buys “Smart” products gets what they deserve.
Someone flag Louis Rossman, I want his snarky take on this ridiculous thing.
Everyone here is simply hating on these bitcoin-mining toasters that earn 10% of your money back. Your toast will be ready in 10-60 minutes.
Is it a toaster that mines bitcoin or a bitcoin mining rig that uses toast as a heat sink
Absolutely.
The only smart toaster I like.
That’s obscene.
Smart toaster… Why? Alot of shit I can understand a justification but unless this toaster takes bags of bread and automatically loads and toasts the smart aspect is useless because who’s loading their toaster and not making toast right away.

















